While I agree with “putting kids first,” I also see Maria’s point that blanket statements that “All moms SHOULD do X or Y” simply do not apply in every situation, and can be excessively divisive in a community that needs, more than any other, to support each other.

I think what was missing from the conversation was an understanding of personality types and how the preferences of each type influneces the choices parents make. Once you understand “motherstyles” you can understand why “putting kids first” can look very different to different mothers.

I would appreciate it if you would listen to the recording of a presentation that I did at the Mom’s Radio Network Winter Conference called “Discover Your Mothering style” (Based on the book Motherstyles: Using Personality Type to Discover Your Parenting Strengths) and let me know if you think that the ideas presented in the recording might have helped resolve the ‘friendly debate’ that happened on Mom Talk Radio.

Here’s the link:
http://www.solutionsforbusymoms.com/blog/2007/2/28/a-solution-for-mommy-guilt-anxiety-discover-your-mothering-style-audio-now-live.html